Party Monster

When you woke up this morning, did you think today would mark the day of seeing the raddest fucking animal to ever walk the planet? My guess would be no. Well, stand up straight and hold your head high, limp dicks, because the visual buffet you are about to feast on will be something to make you proud.

But not yet. No sir. You're going to have to hold it in and wait for it. Like a high schooler, pumping away on his girlfriend for the first time after prom.

I consider myself marginally radder than this dude:



And considerably radder than this dude:



But this character is so fucking outrageously happening and at the point of where I want to be in my life, it makes me sick to think of how much work I have yet to accomplish.

Think of all the cool shit from the eighties that hipsters havent tarnished yet (but I fear may someday soon): Wayfarers, Hawaiian "i dont give a fuck, it's hot out and I want to party" shirts, roller skates, beer, chicks in bikinis, the beach, mad hessian long-haired dudes pre-David Lee Roth, and being called a party loving happening dude and it being about the biggest compliment anyone could ever pay to you.

Enjoy.