Germans

The McRib has remained on sale as a regular item in Germany. Lucky bastards.

Talking farm animals

Getting something off my chest

In college, I would pay $49.99 for a full-disclosure background check from BackgroundChecks.com on the women I would date before going out with them.

Classic chat

At work, we've got a webchat feature that allows customers to chat with sales reps about services and contracts.  Below is a classic example of a conversation with a  customer w/ obviously less than stellar credit, time stamps and all. 

20:22:16 AG: Thank you for contacting (omitted), how may I help you today?
20:27:12 Visitor: how much of a discount do i get working at target 

20:27:40 AG: Target members receive 20% off applicable monthly recurring charges.
20:28:18 Visitor: what about the deposit 

20:28:32 AG: That depends on the outcome of your (omitted) credit check.
20:29:21 Visitor: well if it high or low do i get a discount on my deposit 

20:29:43 AG: No. The deposit is not discountable.
20:30:16 Visitor closed chat window

I'm human.

I cut off three phone calls today by pressing "end" instead of mute, and each one of them was by complete accident.

Create Your Own 24oz / Hr

Loyal Followers -

I'm always getting people emailing and texting me at all times of the day saying "AG, please, tell us how we can have our own 24oz /Hr page, or at least look exactly like yours.  Your design is remarkable and the color palette is not unlike that of a fine Italian oil painting". 

The requests have been more or less nonstop since this blog's inception 11/07.  So, here you go, the exact layout codes to create your own 24oz / Hr.

Page background color: #ffdfbf

Text: #333333

Link: #5588aa

Blog title: #191919

Description: #999999

Title: #cc6600

Border: #aa9b55

Sidebar 1: #999999

Sidebar 2: #666666

Visited links: #aa55a0

Font: Georgia (recently changed because Trebuchet sounds French)

Sidebar font: Veranda

Title font: Georgia

Description: Veranda - Italic

Post footer: Georgia (smaller)

508 Days Later...

Stuck inside these four walls, sent inside forever,
Never seeing no one nice again like you,
Mama you, mama you.
If I ever get out of here,
Thought of giving it all away
To a registered charity.
All I need is a pint a day
If I ever get out of here.

Well, the rain exploded with a mighty crash as we fell into the sun,
And the first one said to the second one there I hope youre having fun.

Band on the run, band on the run.
And the jailer man and sailor sam were searching every one

For the band on the run, band on the run, band on the run, band on the run

Well, the undertaker drew a heavy sigh seeing no one else had come,
And a bell was ringing in the village square for the rabbits on the run.
Band on the run, band on the run.
And the jailer man and sailor sam, were searching every one

For the band on the run, band on the run, band on the run, band on the run

Well, the night was falling as the desert world began to settle down.
In the town theyre searching for us every where, but we never w ill be found.
Band on the run, band on the run

And the county judge, who held a grudge
Will search for evermore
For the band on the run, band on the run, band on the run, band on the run

Credit: Wings